Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Glowing insults

I hopped over to Health & Glow on Sunday. Yes, I do that sometimes. It’s good to go there once in a while to get insulted. The salesgirls in H&G are taught to be offensive. Like, really offensive. Me thinks they have a section in their training programme that’s called “how to be an efficient rude salesgirl”.

So, I was scanning some random shelf, when a tiny girl came from nowhere and asked politely, in a nasal tone -“can I help you madam?” to which I replied my standard eff off “No. Thank you”. But as expected she was right there fearing I might nick things and run. I then had a moment of flashback about an incident which had taken place few months ago in the very same outlet; here goes my flashback:

Salesgirl: “Madam, you can try this madam. It improves dryer”.

A flabbergasted me thought “oh poor H&G! It has started repairing hair dryers?”

But turned out she meant “dry hair” and thrust a shampoo under my nose.

Salesgirl: Your hair is very dry madam. this is good madam..

“Are you jealous?” I wanted to ask her, instead went home and sulked. I vowed not to get insulted again.

But I never learn, do I? So here I was, once again, giving H&G more business. So the nasal voiced salesgirl went on and on about everything I picked from shelf. “Madam (nasal tone) this is verrrry nice product madam. We have 0.08% off madam”.

I was done buying things and was about to leave when she tried one last time:

Salesgirl: Madam those circles around your eyes madam.. we have this special dark circle remover cream madam.

That did it! I tuned into a monster and ate her alive (I mean, I mentally pictured this act).

I merely glared at her and walked away. I CAN snub (it’s tough, however). I grinned while walking towards the billing counter as my eyes caught a bar of chocolate and thought “you little *beep* do you have any idea how hard I work to get these circles around my eyes? Do you work till 3 in the night? and wake up at 7 in the morning? Do you? Eh eh eh?”

I bought a couple of Bournville chocolate bars thinking, “I know I have earned it”.

30 plate meals:

Swaram said...

Ayyo ishtella earn madbeda ma pls ... navella kaitidivi postgagi. Nammanna nenapittukolhuvantavaragi :P :P

Btw, hosa mane hatra ne Chocolate room open aagide and its awesome. bega baa ;) ;)

Anonymous said...

I feel for you sistah! Everytime I go to a parlour in India(no no, Im not being a vain NRI, Im just saying) the girls there are always like 'Your hair is so dry, your face has no glow you should try this treatment we do....' whereas here in Cork if I go for a haircut or something even on one of my worst-hair-days, they are always like 'You have such lovely hair,oh the shine...'

Sigh! Makes me want to do a mottai and sit at home

vimmuuu said...

I second whatever Swarr had written there in Greek :D :D :D :D

But why did you go to H&G in the first place ??? Guess what, I had to accompany Lax to two H&G outlets on Sunday. She went there for a hair clip and ended up purchasing an Oil of Ulay cream for 700 bucks !!! Can you imagine !!! All because of those nosy salesgirls !!! Hmmppphhh !!!!

Again, why did you to H&G in the first place ? If it was someone like Swarr, I can understand. But you dont need any, na ? :D :D :D :D :D (Now, did that boost up your ego? ;) )

Sorry Swarr, kabhi kabhi to make someone feel nice, we have to put down someone in common :D :D :D

Swaram said...

:grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Ahem I naturally bootiful u c :P

What is oil of ulay ????

subbulakshmistoned said...

Those bitches are rude IN YOUR FACE. "Ma'am, look your hair. Very dry. Herbal means no hairfall, dandruff also go. Use madam"
I NEVER buy what those bitches recommend. Jump ya, like that one triumphant smile while paying the bill :P

lostworld said...

Yus Bournville earned (for posting something)!!!!:-)

You should be glad they atleast give you suggestions. I feel so bad noone pays any attention to me, honestly. I'm suspecting they view me as a 'hopeless case' beyond the repair of cosmetic world!! :-( Let me go sulk in a corner.

Anonymous said...

This is the second time I am reading H/G's nosy salesgirls... stay away from them... :D :D

Shruthi said...

@Swaram, :D okok bartini. ashTralli ondashTu chocolates parcel maaDbiDu :P

@Revs, heehee mottai it seems :D and oh these parlor girls are worse! They feel the entire universe is imperfect.
your city sounds better :)

Shruthi said...

@Vimzy boy, *pinching myself* you said that? about me? awww... :D
and yeah those girls are so interfering its hard to believe they are for real!

p.s. I'm surprised you are still alive after that comment :P

p.p.s.yah Vimz whats oil of ulay :P

Shruthi said...

@Swat, and have you noticed how they all talk and look alike? their billing is also screwed. gabbu service.

@Lostworld, ushoo please stop sulking. You are lucky that you dont get mobbed by commission hungry salesgirls. and hellooo! no one can beat me. I am THE hopeless case :p

@Kanagu, is it? we can start a hate club soon :D

SG said...

Pushing the product on a customer is the primary job of a sales person. But saying negative things will really putt off the buyer and the buyer will walk away from the store. The stores should learn then.

Swaram said...

I never go to HnG .. I know what I am losing nw though .. no fodder for the blog :P :P

The Holy Lama said...

Total agreement. Maybe we ought to ask for all kinds of cosmetics, once we spot these nasal girls approaching.

Shruthi said...

@SG, So true. It's not a great way to treat customers. And their arrogance doesn't help either.

@Swaram, hahahah visit the store today!

@Holy Lama, heehee they'd still have something to offer. They are magicians, really!

Subha said...

Nasal tone talk..i can very well relate to your posts..Once she bumped on me and was saying that, why don't I get one pedicure kit!!!!
Aryan's mom

Destiny's child... said...

Lol...loved this write-up! :D
Some sales girls are just out to insult you. When ever I go shopping for clothes I meet sales girls who look ready to faint when I say, 'Can I see somethign else?'

Going to keep up with this blog, here on :)

Shruthi said...

@Aryan's mom, oh they are one big mafia. I told you they all get trained :D

@Destiny's child, thank you :D and hehehee@ reverse torture tactic. Next time I'll ask for more and will not buy anything :P

Anonymous said...

Argh. I know what you mean. Those stupid salesgirls follow you EVERYWHERE, even if you're stepping an inch away, they have to be right behind you, criticising your looks, product selection, skin, hair, weight... The last time I was there, one kept following me so I told her I needed a microdermabrasion kit.

H&G Girl: Why?
Me: Skin, see so horrible
H&G: But this is for anti-ageing
Me: See, my skin has aged no? So horrible no?
H&G: No, no, madam, you don't need it
Me: You mean I don't need any such skin products or whatever right now?
H&G: Yes yes, it's okay
Me: THEN QUIT FOLLOWING ME!

That did the trick ;-)

Shruthi said...

@Chinkurli, lolz splendid! I got off sadistic pleasure :p
Btw me likes your name.. Chinkurli ..Chinkurli .. I can go on and on :D

Karthik Kotresh said...

Firstly, I didn't even know what was H and G until a few days ago. You are the one who cleared it to me. :P
Didn't also know that they are such morons.
I'm sure i'm gonna have a lot of fun if i ever go there. :P

Well, by the way, how are the girls? :P :D

Maanasi said...

yappa!!! So true I say!..last time is felli commented on my skin, She said it'll improve. I wanted to ask her, Did you try it before recommending, cos I dont think it worked on you.

MADHU RAO | (INDImag.COM) said...

You did good there. Those sales people are rude, in your face shadowing you like hawks - at least the ones in B'lore's shopper's stop a few years ago. They were hesitant to show us a cologne ("It's too costly sir..") and I had to ask for the manager and give him a piece of my mind ..ofcourse in front of everyone, else what's the fun ! :-)

Ree nimma Swimming Pool Extn Balaga belitideyalri ?

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

H&G ? Where is that in BLR ?

Shruthi said...

@Karthik, arrey be thankful that there’s no store in Davangere. Painful experience. The salesgirls are all the same. Nasal toned and rude. Still interested? :P

@Maanasi, abha! after how long you visited my blaag ma? This is not done. And yes lets go off to H&G and abuse them ya.

@Madhu, oh salespeople in these big retail stores are of a different breed. Arrogance is their middle name.
howdu Madhu, aadre ondu correction-u, ‘namma’ SP extension baLaga chennaagi beLitide :-)

@Deepa, Health & Glow is everywhere in blr, like parthenium weed :D

~*. D E E P A .* ~ said...

:D :D :D Weed ??!!!!

Luckily, I've never had to go there .... I know a fab lady near my place who does really well ... all of us (cousins, atte, friends elllaru we go to her place only) .... tumba ne comfy in her parlour, mathe jaasti chargeu maadalla .... so perfect ...

Anonymous said...

SP extn antha keLe eshtu santosha aagtide. Nimma mane yelli? Nannannoo serskoLLi numma gumpige!

Shruthi said...

@Deepa, heehee weed andre aa weed alla :P i meant namma congress giDa :) and h&g is not a parlor, ondu retail store-u :)

@Chinkurli, howdaa? you too SP extension-ite eh? :)) awesome! yaav cross-u? naanu aarne cross pakka irtini ;) gumpige welcome-u :D

Swaram said...

Yav cross-o eno :( Nan yakappa Hyderabad nalli beytaidini :P

Chinkurli said...

Not-so-unfortunate circumstances have forced me to make the unfortunate move to what they call the heart of the city (But I don't buy it!). I miss S P Extn *sigh* and 8th cross *sigh*

Shruthi said...

@Swaram, heehee :p

@Chinkurli, let me know when you plan to visit sp extn we can meet up :D